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Now I don't want to provide free advertising and so I won't actually name the shop, but one store I occasionally use in this fair town is well known for selling British products, like Cumberland sausages and Bisto gravy. However, I lately discovered that they have started to sell individual Yorkshire Puddings for just Bt20 (roughly 32p) each. As someone who loves soaking up gravy with a nice bit of Yorkshire, I have been giving this shop a fair bit of custom. Now back in Japan, where I lived for the 14 years before coming to Thailand, such a thing would have been unthinkable. Despite 2 atom bombs and numerous rapes and misdeeds by the US military, Japan remains firmly within the American 'sphere of influence', and so it's much easier to get cranberry sauce or peanut butter 'with jelly' than Yorkshire Pudding or mint sauce. Thailand, however, is different. It may have cooperated with the US in the Indochina War (wrongly known as the Vietnam War, as it also involved/wrecked Laos and Cambodia) but remains far more European than American. Yes, Hua Hin does now have a McDonald's as well as a KFC and Burgerking, but these are more signs of internationalism than Americanism. We regularly get postings from homesick Yanks on the various Hua Hin forums asking where they can get a Thanksgiving dinner or watch the Superbowl, but these pleas are often unanswered. Doubtless hellholes like Pattaya, which were infected by US Army R&R visits during the aforementioned war, are more obliging to our North American cousins. However, here in strictly royalist Hua Hin, and even though King Mongkut offered US President Lincoln elephants to use during the US Civil War, this town has immensely more European residents than American. There are at least a handful of Americans living in Hua Hin, and if any more wish to join them, great. However, be prepared for a town where the locals do NOT assume you're American whenever you speak English!
Thailand didn't enter the modern era overnight and so many aspects of the old Siamese way of doing things still remain. One example is the contempt most men have for women and marriage, meaning that many Thai husbands cling to the old custom of polygamy. Now to give it the appearance of a modern nation, one of the last acts of Thailand's last absolute monarch, King Rama VII, was to outlaw polygamy in 1934, but the custom lingers on in the form of mistresses, which too many Thai husbands maintain. However, Thai women have become more assertive over their rights and so legislation entitling wives to compensation from husbands' mistresses was introduced last year. This allows wives to claim from Bt10,000 to Bt1 million in compensation from their hubby's mistress. Sounds fair, right? But don't forget, this is Thailand. On examination, this legislation proves to be very complicated and if the lovers are civil servants, it becomes so embrangled and drawn out that it often fails completely. It isn't easy being a Thai wife, which doubtless explains why so many choose to marry foreigners. Oh, and don't go thinking that extramarital affairs is the only reason Thai wives are disgruntled. According to the head of the Women Lawyers' Association of Thailand, another common reason for seeking a divorce is the discovery that their husbands are homosexual. I don't which must be the most humiliating, finding out that your hubby has a girlfriend – or a boyfriend!
I've been reading about how Britain is now second only to Mexico when it comes to how many citizens leave home and move abroad permanently. That's a very proud boast and I'm sure the government will mention it in its manifesto come the next election. Now I have lived outside the UK for over 16 years now, all of them spent here in Asia. In that time, I have returned to London just three times, and I have no plans to make it four within the foreseeable future. Why not? Well don't get me wrong. For culture, art and history, London is great, just as England has some truly glorious scenery, but all of this is best viewed on a holiday. After all, who emigrates to India just to see the Taj Mahal? I regularly watch 'Sky News' on satellite TV here, which is very much a British domestic news service, and every time I do, I am reminded of why I don't go back. Yes, Thailand has crime and it also has a ridiculous, Byzantine bureaucracy, corrupt police and politicians, awful infrastructure, and medics who got their MDs from a copier. However, a Thai jail is a bad place to be, making criminals less nonchalant than then their British counterparts about returning there. It also has houses that suit the climate, restaurants that don't need a mortgage to dine in and no laws telling us how to discipline our kids. Thailand may not be paradise and the slogan 'Land of Smiles' might be just a mantra, but it does give places like the UK a run for their money in the 'quality of life' stakes!
Well as the Thai senatorial elections stretched into a second weekend, the booze shops and departments were closed yet again last weekend. I sincerely doubt that crime rates went down or the election was any fairer, but what the hell. The calendar on my wall (from Singha beer) shows a nice picture of Hua Hin Beach, reminding me of why I moved here and why I stay here. Europe suffers a nasty cyclone, Australia has floods, the US is digging itself out from heavy snow and Japan is still shivering around the 10c level, but here, it hasn't dropped below 20c for many days now. Hey, Shangri-la was up in the snow-covered Kunlun Mountains, so I'll stick closer to the beach if you don't mind!
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