Let the train take the strain -- but this is Thailand, so . . .

Sorry this post is a bit late but I have had a lot of paperwork pile up in my ‘in’ tray, and I have also managed to acquire something you might think is hard to get in Thailand — a nasty Cold! Anyway, apologies over, let’s get on with this latest look at life in Hua Hin.

The clan and I decided to take a break next week, and so on this coming Sunday, we shall be catching the sleeper train from Hua Hin across the Malaysian border to Kuala Kedah, from where we’ll take a ferry to the island of Lang Kawi. Now I know that I said we’d cancelled that plan, but you know how it is — a change is as good as a rest, so they say and so we’re back to plan A! Anyhow, to prepare for this trip, we yesterday went to buy the train tickets to Kuala Kedah. A simple move, right? Just go there, pay up and walk away with the tickets, yes? But this is Thailand. We went to the rather picturesque railway station in downtown Hua Hin and asked for the tickets. Now I must admit that the ticket office staff in Hua Hin speak pretty good English and so language wasn’t a problem. However, politics and bureaucracy are! First off, we prefer (not unnaturally) to travel in a first class sleeper cabin, where there are two beds, as compared with second class, where you sleep in what seems like a dormitory on wheels. However, the first class carriages only travel as far as the Thai city of Hat Yai, where they are detached from the train. From Hat Yai to the border and beyond, it’s second and third class only. Simple, buy a separate second-class ticket from Hat Yai to Kuala Kedah, right? No way. The ticket office told us they couldn’t do that, that we would have to (a) try and get the second ticket from staff aboard the train, or (b) jump off the train at Hat Yai, run to the ticket office, buy the tickets and then rush back aboard the train before it departs fro the border. Tickets apart, crossing the Thai border isn’t like crossing into France aboard the Eurostar. You reach the border at a place called Padang Besar, a station that is literally on the border — one end of the platform is in Thailand and the other in Malaysia. You get off the train, rush to get the necessary forms (which are not available before you reach the border) and then you queue to pass through Malaysian immigration. You then get back on the same train and continue south. The train eventually terminates at Butterworth, the port that serves the island of Penang, from where you can travel onto KL and even Singapore. Anyway, that’s the joy we face next Monday morning — we should reach Hat Yai for the ticket office scramble at just after 6am and then reach the border at around 7.55. I shall tell you more if and when I get back to Hua Hin — don’t forget that we’ll be travelling through the troublesome southern provinces that the British Embassy here advises against going even near!

Remember that scenic beach I’ve mentioned a couple of times in previous Blogs, the one at Khao Kaloke? Well, when we went to that restaurant opening a little south of Hua Hin (which I mentioned last time), we met and became friendly with this Swedish family. We decided to share this beach with them and so last Sunday, we took them there. They, too, were amazed at how empty it was and as they are relatively new to Hua Hin, they seemed to assume that as it was cloudy, it was safe to sit out of the shade. By the time we left the beach and shared a few beers on the lawn of my home, I could see that the husband had more than a trace of sunburn around his tank top. It is an easy mistake to make, truly. The UV factor is often at its highest when the skies are overcast and so I kept my shirt on all that day. However, I did get a tiny bit of sunburn where my tan-line meets the pale skin normally hidden by my shorts, but it was truly insignificant. However, the picnic was almost spoilt due to my own unforgivable mistake. You see, I left my backpack at home and inside the backpack was — you guessed it — the bottle opener! However, we did manage to get the bottles open and so the day was saved, though not my reputation!

Another aspect of our intended trip to Malaysia is that we must get ‘Re-entry permits’, so that our visas remain valid after we return. Now as I mentioned in a previous post, the Immigration office is now located in about as inconvenient a part of the town as could be found, and so we will have to give up a half day or so to go and get these stamps in our passports. What’s more, I’m sure that Thai Immigration has a deal with the British Passport Office. Why so? Because every time you get something done at Immigration, whether it be a visa renewal or a re-entry permit, the stamps cover at least half a page in one’s passport. This means I might not make to the end of my passport’s 10-year life without filling every page. Therefore, as the British authorities are too mean and money grabbing to issue you with extra pages, as I believe the Australians and Americans do, I would have to get a new passport. Any excuse to squeeze some more money out of us! What’s more, I hear that with the new ‘biometric’ passport being issued, I may have to go to the Bangkok embassy in person. Life isn’t all Singapore Slings beneath the palm trees out here in the exotic orient, you know…

Anyway, as I might not be recovered from the trek south by this time next week, the next instalment of this blog might be a little late. If so, please do be patient. Anyway, catch you again whenever I return home!

Let's talk rainy season, beaches, wet Malaysia and keeping fit!

A few posts ago, I confidently predicted that rainy season had started — which clearly upset Mother Nature, for since then we haven’t had enough rain to fill a glass! However, the last few days have seen more and more clouds, less and less sunshine (in the later part of the day only), and we even had some rain. Once again, not enough, but some. So is this really it? Is this the onset of the rainy season? I’m not going out on a limb like that again! The rainy season will come when it’s good and ready, and until it does, I for one shall do all I can to make the most of its absence!

Last Sunday (that would be June 10^th), we all went out in the car to a beach we’d stumbled on whilst looking at some new housing projects located on the fare side of Paknampran. Now I should explain that the area where a river flows into the sea is called "Pak Nam" in Thai (Pak = mouth, Nam = water). The Pran part is an abbreviation of Pranburi, so this is where the Pranburi River flows into the Gulf of Thailand. Anyway, while doing a little exploring in this area, a little beyond Paknampran, we stumbled upon this long stretch of white sandy beach, washed by some incredibly clean and blue sea. I later found out that this beach is called Khao Kaloke, and we returned there last Sunday. It was totally deserted, we had the whole long beach to ourselves. The sand was clean, the sea was see-through, and the sun was hot. We had a very nice picnic there, and promised ourselves that we would return soon and often. We couldn’t go this weekend, as we had other appointments, but we will be back whenever the weather allows. OK, I’ll admit that as I haven’t been to the beach for a while (you get careless when it’s so close at hand), and so I did get some sunburn on my shoulders by not putting enough lotion on, but what the hell! Why come to Thailand and stay in the shade?

Another thing that I haven’t done much since moving to Thailand is visit the gym. However, yesterday (Saturday the 16^th), I did precisely that. I visited the cheapest gym in Hua Hin, located at a rather run-down hotel/condo place called ‘Sports Villa’, which also has a very cheap swimming pool. Anyway, after working out which of the machines in the gym actually worked, I did about an hour’s worth of exercise. It wasn’t easy. You see, whereas I used to go to the gym (a proper, everything working gym) in Tokyo two or three times a week, I haven’t been to one since May 2005. So I had a few aching muscles when I’d finished, that’s for sure. However, being the masochist I am, I do plan to repeat this procedure sooner or later. After all, just because I am unlikely to actually work again before October (maybe not even then) doesn’t mean I have to sit around and do nothing but drink beer. I’m not sure why not, but that’s what I’m supposed to say, right?

I have only been outside of this town and its environs once or twice in the last 12 months+, and so I was toying with the idea of popping down to Malaysia for a few days next week, down to the island of Langkawi. I’ve been there before, about 4 or 5 years ago, but I visited the wrong part, staying within walking distance of the ferry terminal — which I later found out wasn’t the best part of the island! Anyway, the ideas grew more attractive the more I thought about it — catching the night train down to Malaysia, swigging Chang beer until I fell asleep in my rather comfortable sleeper compartment, and then exploring a few beaches where the signs, if not in English, are at least in the same alphabet. However, I’d forgotten how much wetter Malaysia is than this part of Thailand, and so it came as a shock when I checked the week’s weather forecast for the island. Thunderstorms all day, every day for the whole week! So it looks like that trip is off, for the time being at least. After all, with the rainy season possibly well on its way to Hua Hin, I might as well watch the rain from my own home than from some hotel room!

A veteran pal of mine, an Aussie who's son is due to be posted to either Iraq or Afghanistan at the end of this year, is planning to celebrate an upcoming wedding anniversary by holidaying in Thailand next year. He was so impressed by the advice I was able to give him that he (a) asked me to help him arrange a pre-embarkation holiday for his son around Christmas time, & (b) has spread the word about Hua Hin to the other members of his regimental association. Word-of-mouth advertising, the best there is. I must admit I do like Aussies, as they are so in your face & easy to get on with. Of course, such sentiments went out of the window yesterday, when the Tri-Nations rugby tournament began with South Africa only just managing to beat Oz in Cape Town. However, if SA gets kicked out of the World Cup early (in France later this year), then Oz is the one I will support.

A large new housing project just a little south of Hua Hin, put together by a Swiss friend of mine, is opening its on-site restaurant this weekend and I've been invited to the opening. As this project is pleasantly out of town, it should be a nice break from the usual routine. It's in the evening, so it shouldn't be too hot. What's more, being on a Sunday (today), it didn't interfere with the rugby! Anyway, I have to get ready for that now so I shall love you and leave you till next time.

Don't you just love doctors -- & Immigration!

I'm a bit late with this week's blog, but that isn't in any way linked with the medical I mentioned last week. That went surprisingly easily. I did have a few appointments to carry out and these seemed to balloon until the time just flew past. Anyway, enough of the excuses, on with the motley…

The medical. Well, it was as unorganised as one would expect from a small town Thai hospital. One thing it had in common with all other medical exams was the totally impractical attitude of the doctors/administrators. I mean, they tell you not to eat or drink for many hours before the examination but then they expect you to provide a urine sample on demand. Excuse me, but unless you fill the bucket, you can't get any water, OK? Sure enough, this exam asked for a urine sample — they even asked for a sample of the other stuff — but I admit I'd cheated. I had a glass of water when I woke up that morning. The way the doctor's face changed when I told her this, you'd have thought I'd confessed to raping her daughter! But be fair — it gets over 30c pretty early here, so not drinking water for a long time is downright unhealthy! But little things like that don't matter to a doc who learned his theory from a book written somewhere that never gets that hot! Anyway, I was eventually told that my cholesterol is a little high and that I should give up smoking. The former was very surprising, as the Tokyo doctors used to claim my cholesterol was as high as President Bush's disapproval rating, and the latter was amazing, as I haven't had a smoke this year! I gave up cigarettes a long time ago but I do occasionally smoke a pipe — though not for several months. Of course, this was San Paulo, a hospital more famed for its plastic surgery than its medical skills, and so anything it tells me must be taken with a ladle of salt. Strangely enough, my wife's results were identical to my own — which is strange bearing in mind the difference in our ages (11 years), diets (she eats as I should do), lifestyle (she does aerobics twice a week, and I don't), etc. Next year, I might try Bumrungrad in Bangkok. It's much more expensive but it does have a reputation!

Apart from that, the only news is the moved immigration office. When I first moved to Hua Hin, the nearest Immigration office was located in a temporary building at the end of a long dirt road on the Burmese border about 80km south of here. Then they opened an office in downtown Hua Hin, inside the town's police station. However, this convenience may have led some foreigners to think that Thailand welcomed them and wanted to make their lives easier — not the idea the government wanted at all! So to make sure we all know what the government truly thinks of us, the office has been moved. It is now about 8km south of downtown, located a long way up a Paschendale-like (i.e., potholed) Soi. It has no neighbours, as it stands alone in the middle of a building site. Therefore, if you forget to bring enough photocopies or ID photos, you can't just pop across the road to the Kodak supermarket (as was the case before the latest move), you have to drive at least 7 or 8 km, hoping to find a shop with the right facilities. OK, the new office is more comfortable and less crowded but if you don't have your transport, you are in trouble. Yes, you can take a tuk-tuk or motorbike taxi, but first you need to explain to the driver where you're going! So does the new office provide a map you can show a driver? Of course not — that would defeat the whole purpose of the move! However, it could be worse — they had considered locating the office at the top of Hin Lek Fai Mountain, the tallest mountain in this vicinity. Of course, you can hire an agent to do your Immigration paperwork for you, and those agents might well bless this move. And even the new locale is still preferable to the Work Permit office, located in the provincial capital about 90km south of here. But I suppose I should think more along Thai lines. A trip to the work permit office? A nice drive through the Thai pineapple fields! Going to the new Immigration office? A chance to get out of town and sit on a comfy sofa in an air-conditioned room! It all depends on your point of view, I suppose. However, as you can see from the banner shown below, the Thai Immigration website claims "We try to make it easy for you to stay". Yeah, right -- like the taxman tries to help you get richer!